Homework

The Cat Princess

Under pressure from MIL and the Hub (and myself, of course), I tried a few months back to get Baby Girl to work on her letters and numbers. In another age I would have, like my mother when I was a kid, corrected the fact that she was incapable of doing anything with a few strokes of the cane. Like I did when I was teaching Eldest Son to learn (actually we didn't have a choice as he had to read and write within 3 months of starting Grade 1). But even I am capable of moving with the times.

I was furious when I realised that she couldn't do anything. And I am sure that kids her age are more than capable of learning since I have my own niece (younger by 6 months) as an example. But then I decided (against myself) to let her be. I knew somehow that she will learn better when she's ready. Every child is ready at his or her own pace. And I didn't want to be upset all the time with her.

Interestingly, in France since 1957, teachers are normally advised against giving homework to the younger children. Being a socially-responsible society, they didn't want the gap between kids who have parents capable of helping them with homework and those who don't to widen. In fact, if a teacher has to give a child homework, it must not be something new but be based on something that the child has already learnt in class. In reality, this is rarely respected, of course. In the better schools, homework is a part of life.

A respected child psychologist wrote recently that there is no point giving homework to a child before the age of 9 or 10. For the simple reason that homework affects the relationship between parent and child.

I think she wasn't far off because I remember now that my relationship with Eldest Son had gone really downhill ever since he started school. And if there is one thing stopping me from having a 4th child (besides age, wealth and weight), it's homework. For a few years now, each time I see the boy, I would ask him, "Have you any homework? Have you finished your homework?" And I'm starting to do the same to Baby Girl...

But like many parents especially those who from one generation to another have moved from poverty and illiteracy to a better life and who have tasted the freedom that education could bring, it is difficult to not want to help the children succeed. I personally am thankful to my mom for always hanging around with her cane and assessment books pushing me to do well academically. But I am a different child from my own children.

So it all boils down to doing so intelligently and productively which is really difficult. And I am a failure when it comes to this.

Anyway, all this to say that 2 days ago, out of curiosity, I gave Baby Girl a simple Maths worksheet that freaked her out just a few months ago. I was surprised to see her take to it like fish in water. She finished all of it without my forcing her I guess probably because she could do it now.

No, it doesn't mean that I'm going to give her more work now. I never thought I'd ever say it, but I'm happy to see her play. Childhood does fly by so quickly. Besides she'll learn better when she's happy. And if you see her draw, you'll know that she has a talent for it. Maybe she'll be an artist like her paternal grandmother.